What is Marriage Coaching?
At Marriage & Family Works, we do not offer marriage "counseling."  We offer something that we find can help even more, called Marraige Coaching.

Have you been through Marriage Counseling without any real change? Are you ready to take adifferent approach? Marriage Coaching can help. While counseling is beneficial in some cases, Marriage Coaching produces action, and action produces change.  As every session includes action steps, progress is inevitable. Marriage Coaching can take you from where you are now in your marriage to where you would like to be. Remember, 96.5% of  those who receive Life Coaching are successful in reaching their initial coachable goal!

You and your spouse may be "stuck" in a certain area of your marriage.  Ask yourself this question: "If things continue as they are now, where will we be in 5 years?"
If you are uncomfortable with that answer, it may be time to make some progress; it may be time to obtain Marriage Coaching through our Workshops and Marriage Weekends.   Private Marriage Coaching Sessions may be available, if schedules allow.

One primary reason Marriage Coaching is a successful avenue of help to marriages is found in the fact that "coaching" is about taking responsibility for one's own part of the solution. Often times, one person in the relationship simply isn't willing to make change.  Marriage Coaching can help you to respond in the most appropriate way possible.  Marriage Coaching is not therapy, but instead helps couples get unstuck through relationship education.  Also, Marriage Coaching teaches healthy relationship skills such as confiding, communication and problem solving skills, while having successful married couples coach from their years of experience, mistakes and training.

As you apply the skills taught in Marriage Coaching, you begin to respond differently.  You will find the patterns and habits in your marriage begin to change.  Marriage Coaching develops a plan that is unique to your marriage.  Toe goal is to help both you and your spouse come to a place of taking repsponsibility for what can be done to make progress.  As both you and your spouse take action, change is inevitable!

What is the Difference Between Coaching and Counseling?
The word "coaching" uses a metaphor from the sports community, where coaching is an established activity.  No team of athletes would consider trying to reach excellence without a coach.  In being coaches, one does not have to admit either to needing help or even having a problem, so the shame-based feelings often triggered by counseling are by-passed.  It is no disgrace to have a coach, when even Brett Fahre has had them!

The Coaching field developed out of the need for those in business to develop themselves and their organizations.  Life Coaches have helped thousands of people across our country in developing themselves personally and professionally.  Accordingly, there are many who have had long-term successful marriages.  These "marriage professionals" can impart into other couples the skills and experiences that have made them successful in their relationships.  Thus, relationship and marriage coaches assist couples in developing a healthy, strong, vibrant relationship and marriage.

Psychotherapy tends to focus on issues of pathology, healing and unresolved psychological issues of the past.  Coaching, however, begins with the present and assists people in setting very clear and specific goals that they want to achieve in the future and holding them accountable to the actions they determine or identifiy as appropriate.
While the past may be discussed on occasion, it is addressed in the context of discovering what is blocking the person from moving forward and developing the close and connected relationship they seek.  The focus is on movement and taking action, not necessarily on insight or understanding.

Counselors and Therapists work more from a solution focused or systematic end of the therapy spectrum.  The word "therapy" conjures up he notion that someone is in need of help or a cure.  Those who work with a Coach do so because they choose to, not because they need to.

Coaches are seen as people with a set of skills they use to support and encourage people to acbieve their goals.  A coach can be seen as an accountability partner that you check in with to review your progress.

What does the Marriage Coaching process consist of?
Marriage Coaching takes place in our Marriage HOPE Weeklends; our Soul Healing Love Workshops and in Private Sessions, if schedules permit. 


Who Can Use a Relationship or Marriage Coach?
Relationship coaching can be used for a variiety of reasons.  Some of these are: Premarital Education; Dating Couples, Engaged Couples, Newlyweds; Marriage Enrichment; Marriage in Crisis.

More Information About Marriage Coaching
Marriage Coaching is a unique relationship in which couples take active responsibility for their growth and change.  Marriage Coaches listen well, sometimes teach, and always provide encouragement and support for couple's goals.

"Marriage Coaches help couples move to action in their desired areas of growth."

Marriage Coaches are not mentors, but they may have helpful experiences to share.  Marriage Coaches do not expect to develop a long-term friendship with the couple.
Marriage Coaches are not teachers, but they may share information that is new to couples.
Marriage Coaches are facilitators: They help couples to talk, listen and resolve conflict.
Marriage Coaches are providers:  They provide structure, encouragement and support.
Marriage Coaches are committed to the couple in a shared process of helping them reach their goals.

Who Can Benefit?
We serve a variety of couples, including couples preparing for marriage; couples who want to strengthen their marriage by increasing their emotional literacy and improving their communication and conflict resolution skills; couples in crisis, separated or considering a divorce.

Any couple can benefit from this skills-based approach if they are motivated to grow and change and are willing to be responsible for the process. Other approaches may be necessary as supplements, but every couple can benefit from impoved abilities to listen, ask, set goals and do exercises to prevent misunderstandings, build closeness and to handle emotionally charged and difficult conversations in a way that builds the relationship instead of eroding it.  the strength of this approach in that it is about a process of thinking and communicating that any couple can learn to help them communicate about the uniqueness of their marriage.

Private Marriage Coaching Sessions
If private Marriage Coaching Sessions are available, couples meet with their coaches one per week for the first 5 weeks.  At that time we will re-evaluate the status of the marriage.  Some issues can be resolved in a few sessions, while others may take longer.  A typcial session lasts between 60 and 90 minutes.
The value of a Private Coaching Session is $80.  Scholarships may be available for those who qualify.

Private Marriage Coaching Sessions are typically done "couple to couple."  Couples benefit from the Coaches' years of marriage, experience as trainers and speakers and their familiarity with today's best materials, methods and skills in marriage ministry and relationship education.  A hallmark of our coaching is openness about our own marriages.

The first session may include the Coaches learning about the couple's goals for their relationship, sharing about our policies and proceedures and answering questions about our qualifications and the coaching process.  After the couple agrees to move ahead with the Marriage Coaching process, the Information and Consent form is signed.

How are We Qualified to be Marriage Coaches?
In addition to the experience and resource of our ownmarriages, we are certified to lead couples through Prepare/Enrich inventories; Smart Start; PAIRS and Christian PAIRS classes, Relationship Enhancement, PREP classes; FOCUS/REFOCUS Inventories; Family Wellness; Intimate Life Ministries; Soul Healing Love; Ministry Insights Assessments and more.  We have a good working knowledge of numerous resources and methods to help couples prepare, strengthen and repair their marriage. We use our combined knowledge and experience to probide individualized marriage coaching to help couples achieve their goals.

For more information about the Marriage Coaching offered at Marriage & Family Works, please call Sandy James at 941-827-0500.

Disclaimer--Coaching is not counseling.  It is not a diagnosis and treatment of mental, emotional or addictive conditions.  If such issues, or others like abuse, are suspected or revealed, coaches may refer couples for a professional counseling consultation in addition to or in lieu of coaching.  Marriage & Family Works marriage coaches do not present themselves as professional counselors, but as coaches who facilitate relationship learning and communication via tools and information which they have been trained and certified to use and teach.  No promises regarding outcome of relationships is given or implied.  Marriage Coaching facilitates relationship learning through couples interactions.  All decisions about the relationship belong to the couple.  The couple can discontinue marriage coaching at any point if they feel their best interest is not being served.